Breakin' the law

Yesterday I broke two of my own personal do-or-die laws: 1) never EVER EVER EVER buy a bag of Halloween candy that includes Reese's PB cups and 2) never EVER EVER EVER open Halloween candy a minute before we see the trick or treaters approaching the door.

Both laws were enacted in 2003 after I ate a whole bag of mini Reese's cups by myself in one dark mid-October week. Since then, for my safety and well-being, our H'ween candy has mostly been Snickers & Kit Kats, neither of which I like and am not tempted to eat. And we usually wait until the actual day of Halloween to buy any candy. And we don't open it ahead of time.

But yesterday in Target I had to buy candy for the kids' school Halloween party. So I figured I might as well get our trick-or-treat candy too. And so I grabbed about 8 of those huge (on sale) assortment bags not realizing they had PB cups in them until I got home and unloaded. I should have got right back in the car and returned them. Because OF COURSE as soon as Anders was napping, I popped that bad boy open.

And yes I practically mainlined 4 PB cups in a matter of minutes. I haven't had one since about Valentine's Day and they tasted mighty good. Now I need to dig deep into the musty corners of my mind and try to find my will power for the next 36 hours.

Not right

Let me see if I have this right.

October 29. Check.
Costumes ready. Check.
Candy bought (more on that tomorrow). Check.
Nice cool fall weather. WRONG.



Yes. That is actual. My car thermometer read 100 this afternoon. The kids are going to get heatstroke trick-or-treating.

And how about our lovely "bonfire?"



Let's pray that summer is finally over before Thanksgiving gets here.

I'm thinking

"Courage is contagious. When a brave man takes a stand, the spines of others are often stiffened." - Billy Graham

Still in shorts & flip-flops

C'mon weather. I mean it's not like I expect a White Christmas or anything, but really highs in the 90s in late October. Boo.

See this chart? The red zone means temps in the 90s. Another sweaty Trick or Treat night coming up....

Low priority

What kind of kids am I raising that would rather watch some ridiculous cartoon than the last nail-biting seconds on the Alabama-Tennessee game!?!!!?

Why do we only have 1 TV?

Why? Why?

I'm going to check the Box Scores again...

Great Scott!

In my last post, as I was carrying on about work and home and motherhood and stuff, I DID neglect to mention a truly stellar individual from my previous WorkingGirl life. So please allow me to introduce my good friend, former mentor and all-around Best Boss Ever, Scott.

Scott hired me onto his team just when I thought I'd be unemployed due to a relocation from Pittsburgh to Florida that was wholly out of my control. I was happy for the opportunity, but even more happy to be working for someone I suspected was going to be really fun to work with.

Scott is one of the kindest, most generous people I know, but can always be counted on for a hilariously snarky and/or honest comment when needed.

Scott was, and I am sure still is to whomever he works with these days, a Great Boss. He made our job fun. I always learned something from him. And although he let me "run with the ball" far more often that I probably deserved, he always knew when he needed to step in, rein me in, or redirect my efforts. And he always did so in the most gracious and professional way. He may have often gone home and drank heavily after a day of dealing with me, but he never let it show at work.

Scott is unbelievably creative, although I bet he'd deny it if you said so directly to his face.

Scott always had my back. He always gave credit where it was due. I always knew exactly where I stood with him. Scott made sure I - and we, as a team - shone!

Scott was one of the reasons I really, really, really, really loved my job, and was one of the reasons it was incredibly hard to leave. I was insanely jealous of the person who replaced me because I knew HE was working with Scott.

Scott is a great cook! I still have dreams about these awesome lobster enchiladas he made in 2001. I raved about them and he gave me the recipe. Years later, I showed the recipe to Mr. J and told him that's what I wanted for my birthday dinner. Mr. J offered that perhaps we should just ask Scott to make them for me because he was pretty sure that he wasn't up to the task.

I'm pretty sure that my family feels like they've met him because I used to talk about him all the time. Come to think of it, I still do on occasion.

So there you have it. Just a few of the many wonderful aspects of my friend Scott. I haven't even touched on the many funny stories, what a great dad he is, etc. You'll just have to imagine all that. Or, better yet, hope that one day YOU get to meet Scott too.

Thanks Scott!

Because I am

A few months ago, I had a mini-epiphany about being a Stay-at-Home-Mom (SAHM).

I started my new career when Dags was not quite 2, leaving a job & a career that I loved. It was an incredibly hard decision. I worked for a great company with people I was really friends with; I learned a lot and I think I contributed a lot too. So the decision to become a SAHM was unusually protracted and I tried to keep working for as long as I could before Mr. J and I decided that the place that I truly needed to be was at home. We are blessed and I am grateful that I have been able to continue to stay at home.

Even so there have been times, especially since Anders was born, where I questioned what I was doing. I felt jealous that I couldn't go out to lunch, or shop, or relax like I used to. I even missed the positive feedback and approval of my co-workers. So much of being a SAHM can be seen as drudge work. It is an incredibly thankless job.

But then, right about the beginning of this past summer, I suddenly realized that one of the reasons I was feeling stressed and confused and envious of my friends who seemed to have more free time was that I had been trying to do too much, focusing on the wrong things and not really thinking about what it means to be a SAHM. I am a HOMEMAKER. I make our home what it is. Mr. J may provide the means, but I am the catalyst for almost everything here. If the kids are miserable and cranky, it is my job to figure out why and help them learn to work things out. If the house is dirty, it is my privilege to clean it and watch it sparkle and shine. Accepting these things, rather than inwardly rebelling against them, helped me to have a much more positive outlook. An "attitude of gratitude" as they say at school.

So today, after yet another sleepless night with Anders up every 20 minutes, I reached down deep, said a prayer and dove in to my day with a smile on my face. Laundry, cleaning, fluffing pillows and sheets, baking a pumpkin spice cake ... I asked for all of this and in return? The satisfaction of a job well done. By me. For my family.

Also? It doesn't hurt that we're inaugurating our anniversary present tonight:

Yeah, you're darn right that's a 45,000 BTU, 3-burner, rotisserie-and-side-burner-equipped, granite work-surfaced, stainless steel grill hooked up conveniently to the natural gas line at our house (no toting LP tanks for me). What more could a girl want after 10 wonderful years of marriage?!

This is Anders

He is three. He is sweet. He is stubborn. He is emotional. He is very talkative. He can be shy. He can drive you crazy or smother you with litt*le-boy kisses. Sometimes at that same time.

He does not sleep much.

He is a very picky eater.

He does not like to play by himself.

He thinks it's funny to use "potty talk."

He is allllll boy.

He is smart. He likes to be read to. He can count to 20.

He has a volatile temper and we're trying to teach him to "use his words."

He spends quite a bit of every afternoon in time out.

He is a lot of work.

He challenges me to be a better mom every single day. I pray every morning that I will rise to that challenge, meet it, and surpass it.

This and that

Crazy week. Girl Scouts, gymnastics, cleaning, dr. appts, vet appts, deliveries, yard work, meetings, Halloween costumes to make, company coming this weekend, trip to Naples to see my mom & dad .... lots of balls to juggle right now.

If you're looking for something to do this weekend, how about the Euclid/St.Paul neighborhood Haunted Hike? It's a lot of fun, and the weather is supposed to cool off by Saturday. I so need a break from 90 degree days!!!

Lizard Update: If you've been following the saga of the Lost Lizard, I'm happy to report it has finally been FOUND. Unfortunately found by my poor Dagny, but still FOUND. We were cleaning out the MomMobile on Saturday and as she was sorting through the bag of beach toys she suddenly let loose this piercing shriek and started to cry. She ran inside and I found her frantically scrubbing her hands. I asked what happened (I thought she got stung by something) and she said a "dried up lizard with its eyes popping out" fell out of a bucket onto her hand. While not happy that it happened to her (although I'm glad it didn't happen to me because I can feel my heart racing just typing that sentence), I helped her scrub for a few more minutes and told her that it was probably the Lizard that had crawled into the car and now we don't have to worry about it anymore! So it was ultimately a Good Thing. Though maybe not for her.

Look who's on Oprah

I don't watch Oprah, but I'll make an exception today for one of my favorite "mommy-bloggers" - NieNie.

I don't know her IRL and I'll most likely never meet her, but her story and her faith are truly inspirational. Her outlook on being a wife and mother may not be for everyone, but her outlook on family life is something we should ALL aspire to these days.

Down the drain

Holy greenbacks. Another institution goes belly up.

Read this. Two of my magazine subscriptions - SHUTTERED. I don't care much about Cookie - I think I got it as a gift subscription with an Amazon order. But Gourmet? COME ON. It's been around forever. And I just re-upped for another year!

Argh.

Happy fall y'all

While the rest of the country is talking about the crisp air, frost on the ground, sweaters and pumpkins, we Floridians are enjoying a perfect beach day. Blue skies, UV index out the roof, no humidity. PERFECT. I love fall.

Fall

Fall is here! Fall is here! I woke up this morning to a blissfully cool, unsticky 72 degrees. Fall.

Windows open, pumpkin scones baking, kids off to school. Fall.

Resisted the urge to wear a sweater to drop-off. But I did wear jeans for the first time this year. Fall.

And sure, it'll be in the high 80s by noon and we'll have the a/c on later. But the turn has come and I am pretty certain that we'll be able to open the windows every morning from now until April. Fall.

Good-bye to 24/7 a/c. Good-bye humongous electricity bill. Fall is here!

Is she talking about lizards AGAIN?

If you're a regular reader, then you know I have a well-documented terror slash fear slash phobia of lizards and frogs. Despite Mr. J's skepticism, it IS a real phobia and has a real name which I can't remember right now. I also have several lizard&frog-based theories, prime among them being that the lizards&frogs step up their efforts to get into the house when Mr. J is out of town.

For instance: Sunday night, a random huge frog?toad? who didn't get the memo that Mr. J was leaving MONDAY launched itself at our glass-paneled front door as we were watching the season premier of the Amazing Race. I suppose, what with our door being in total disrepair and as ancient as all the other fixtures in our house and it being a fairly large frog?toad?, we're lucky that it didn't knock the glass right out of the moulding thus landing it in our foyer. Mr. J did the honorable thing and without so much as a single cuss word, snuck out our alternate front door, crept up to it and smacked it across the porch with a folded-up Whole Foods brown paper bag (does that count as recycling?). So it goes hopping across the porch for a bit then I saw it hop up and over the wall into the gardenia bushes. Which will now go unweeded for another few weeks because I'm not messing with frogs. But I digress. Where was I? Lizards.

As planned, Mr. J left Monday afternoon for his biz trip and so I shouldn't have been a bit surprised when I found a lizard lurking behind the reading chairs at 10:00 p.m. last night. I WAS surprised that the only reason I found it was that I was hustling over to get to Fizzy who was noisily throwing up in the corner -- all over the lizard. I didn't know whether I should be completely torqued at the dog, who is so utterly high maintenance that if you delay her evening snack by just 30 minutes she will retaliate by throwing up, or completely grateful to her for doing it on the lizard. Anyway, the lizard, which was fairly large compared to the ones that have snuck in lately, was obviously stunned and alarmed by this twist of fate and not moving quickly. Which gave me a chance to run for a can of bug spray (oh yes, Raid stops more than ants & roaches in their tracks) and a shoe. So I drowned it in Raid, whacked it with the shoe (Mr. J's Merrells. Sorry honey.) and then securely covered it with a Hawaiian lei patterned Dixie cup leftover from Dagny's birthday party. Where it will remain until Mr. J returns.

Then I used gloves and roughly half a roll of Bounty, along with my now-standard holy trio of Lysol, Febreze and Slatkin's air freshener to clean up after the dog and mop up the overflow Raid puddles. Wait, didn't I write that exact same line just a few days ago? II've had quite enough of cleaning up after the dog . Who snuck that into my job description?

And, if anyone is interested, there is still no sign of the lizard in my MomMobile, so I will probably give it another week and then declare it dead. At least in reality. In my head it will live on and on.

Extracurriculars

As promised, Dagny has started ballet and gymnastic lessons after school. She is happy as a clam to be doing something other than swim lessons, I'll tell you. I'm still happy I took a hard line approach to making her learn to swim though, because she's as at home in the water as a fish. FINALLY.

We're about to embark on Swim Lessons, Part II since Anders will be registered to start spring swim. I thought it was a good idea to let him get settled into school before adding anything else. I hope he gets the hang of it quicker than Dagny though -- and with way less trauma.

It's hard to believe they've already been in school a whole month.

Tim

Did anyone else out there watching the UF-Kentucky game last night almost DIE when Tim Tebow didn't get up? I just started praying and pacing and freaking out a little - it took me the rest of the game to get my heart rate back to normal. But he did get up and hopefully it is just a concussion. And thankfully John Brantley is an excellent back-up QB -- in any other college program he'd be the starter. And now he might get his chance at UF.

Here's the story.

Get better, Tim. You know everyone in the Gator Nation is pulling for you!

Confession!

And it turns out it's not the poor dog's fault at all.

Anders confessed to feeding her his unwanted Granny Smith apple slices during snack on Thursday. Well, confess implies he came to me all guilty and sad-eyed to own up to his misdeed. Instead I caught him sneaking her pieces of quesadilla at lunch today. And this after I was up at 4:00 a.m. to take her out, and then I couldn't get back to sleep, and then I spent the wee hours of the morn wondering what dread disease she would be diagnosed with next week at her annual checkup.

So I was in a less than understanding mood about the quesadilla.

"Anders! Stop!" I said. "What's wrong with you?! Remember Fizz can't eat people food? Now throw out that hunk of gnawed quesadilla!"

Anders, looking guilty, "Sorry Mommy! I remember. She only eats apples."

"Apples? No, she doesn't eat apples either. No people food."

"Well, she ate them at snack yesterday." (By yesterday he could mean any day in the past, but the only day we had apples was for snack on Thursday afternoon.)

Ah. Mystery solved. At least we don't need an ultrasound and $50 worth of steroids and antibiotics.

Camels, straws, etc.

You know how you have that one thing that is THE dealbreaker? The line in the sand? The straw that finally breaks the camel's back?

Turns out mine is canine incontinence.

The dog just destroyed the art room. Never seen the likes of it. Such. A. Mess. It rivals our famous "river of poo" story.

So instead of Anders & I making banana bars w/ cream cheese icing (sorry Debbie, no treats this weekend!), I get to clean up dog s**t from the art room's finely grooved pine wood floors and Anders gets to make funny observational comments about: the smell, the dog, Mommy's language, the state of the art room, poop in general. Which is actually sort of a high point for him because everyone knows how funny poop is to a 3-year-old.

After my thorough cleaning and bleaching, I have the holy trio of Lysol, Febreze and Slatkin's home fragrance at the ready.

Doggy Depends are next.

This old house, or stuff I'm working on (or should be)

Weeding the yard. But with temps in the mid 90s and similar humidity, I'm not feeling too bad about letting this slide for another month. But. It's still atrocious!

Figuring out how to re-place our paver patio area. We still have the pavers, just need to get them back down. See above for the reason I'm putting this off.

Cleaning, decluttering and reorganizing upstairs closets. Some people do this in the spring, I do it in the fall.

Weed out all the 2T clothes from Anders' dresser and take them to the consignment store. Will have to wait until a school morning or I'll risk encountering some, um, pushback on certain items. Like the navy and maroon striped tee that is way too small, but one of his favorites. Dagny calls it his Winnie-the-Pooh shirt since his tummy sticks out.

Search around for: a game table for the living room, bunkbeds for Anders, desk & chair for Dags. I'm thinking Craigslist is a good place to start.

Buy caddies for cleaning supplies so I don't have to schlep them upstairs every time I clean.

Learn how to work the sewing machine so I can make window treatments. And a tablecloth.

Buy wood blinds for master bath.

Check out Etsy for art for the living room.

Frame kids' art for the playroom and our sunroom.

Decide what the heck we're going to do about our lack of a back door.

'Nuff.

Homework

Any tips out there (Debs? Stacey?) for making homework fun? Oh, and also for motivating a distracted seven-year-old? We've apparently lost our homework mojo over the summer.

It's causing her to want to rush through it, she makes silly errors, and stumbles over easy stuff. We've gotta get our groove back! Although knowing Dags it'll come back on it's own...