Anxiety prone

Maybe it is just a pregnancy thing, but I'm so much more anxious about stuff these days. Like today - sort of a milestone, D's first school field trip. We're going to a Jack Hartmann concert and I volunteered to be a driver. Starting about 3:00 a.m. I started worrying about it - what if I get lost, what if the other kid I'm driving gets car sick, what if I can't get her car seat in the car (being in a not-so-flexible state, it's a legit concern!), what if it rains and the traffic is bad....sheesh. I ran through about 100 different non-problems, almost e-mailed D's teacher to tell her we weren't coming, then woke up at 6 to tell myself it's all in my head. Crazy prego hormones. Ugh.

I'm really trying to be aware of our time committments though and I've made an extra effort not to over-programme our days. Still, we're supposed to go straight from the concert this a.m. to playgroup to my OB appointment and somehow get to the grocery store and figure out something for lunch -- it's just a bit much, so I suspect something will get skipped. I've found if I overdo it, by the end of the day I'm worn out and I get terrible Braxton-Hicks contractions and literally feel like my bladder is going to fall out of me. Which should be a REAL cause for anxiety, but I don't have time to think about it with all the made-up nonsense going through my head.

Saturday morning surprise

The original title of this post was supposed to be 10.5, which is the average number of hours I've been sleeping at night for the last week. It's been heaven not having to get up early to get D to school and since M has been sleeping in as well, we're all as lazy as can be. BUT, I had to change the title because after my lovely 10.5 last night, I woke up about 8, took a nice hot shower and as I came into our bedroom, I noticed a funny little black thing in the door to the hall. No biggie -- looked like a ponytail holder or maybe yard debris tracked in by the dog. So I got some TP to pick it up and when I grabbed it lo! and behold it was a frickin' baby black SNAKE. It squiggled around at me and I threw the whole thing onto the floor yelling for M to help. Luckily, D was already awake playing Lego in her room and when she heard me yell, had the good sense to yell back "I'm staying in here! Don't let it come in my room Mommy!"

So M got our official Wildlife Trapper Tupperware container (in case you aren't familiar with this style, it's the nice large square one that has trapped field mice, baby rats, lizards, spiders, a baby frog, and now, a black snake) and managed to scoop it up using the official Wildlife Trapper Flexible Cutting Board, and he and D took the whole thing into the front yard to let it go. He's very humane about the animals we trap - the vast majority are let go alive due to a nasty incident he had with a glue trap about 15 years ago. Long story. Tell you later.

Anyway, so the thing is out of the house, thank goodness, but now I'm left wondering how exactly it got in and wound up in our doorway without attracting anyone's attention - especially the dog's, some watchdog she is! - and if there are any others slithering around. Things that make you go hmmmm, indeed.

So that was our Saturday. Later in the morning we went down to the Farmer's Market where I scored some sourdough bread and then we all had smoothies and M got a veggie burger and I bought some chocolate. After lunch, D and I had our ritual Food Network Festival wherein we get caught up on all the eps of Barefoot Contessa, Paula Deen and Everyday Italian that I TiVo during the week. All in all, a nice day, even with the weird start.

Into the ficklemint

So here's what's been occupying my mind for the last week or so. D saw the Tarzan episode of Backyardigans last week and when, at dinner, I asked her for a re-cap she went through the whole show and insisted that part of it was them going "into the ficklemint." "Do you mean peppermint?," we asked. Spearmint? Basement? I think we ran though every possible _mint/ment combination until we all gave up in frustration. Especially me, since I take great pride in being fluent in Three-Year-Old-ese.

Anyway, I finally figured it out today - Into the Thick of It. I can move on now.

I had my 5 month check up last week. Everything looks great with BabyBoy and I'm very pleased to have only gained 10 lbs. so far. One reason it's a lot easier to keep my munching in check is the terrible heartburn I have every time I eat. Ugh.

Next week we get ready for our annual Easter Weekend Family Gathering. This year, in addition to my whole family, we'll be joined by M's brother and his wife and 4 kids. So it ought to be quite a crowd. We decided to rent a tent and some big tables and chairs so that we can all be outside in comfort while we eat and visit. It would be quite difficult to cram 14 adults and 7 kids into our teeny house, so pray for a continuation of the great weather we've had so far this spring.

For Easter Sunday I'm serving pastries/muffins, fruit, baked ham, hashbrown casserole, green bean salad, rolls, hard-boiled eggs and cake and/or lemon meringue pie for dessert. Plus coffee, mimosas, etc. Hope there's enough variety for adults and kids alike.

Expecting

Big news! We've been hesitant to broadcast it, but we're pregnant again! I'm officially 21 weeks (yay! past the half-way mark) and out of the most dangerous time for miscarriage, so I'm finally feeling comfortable talking about it. The most exciting part is that it's a BOY! Oh boy! I'm so used to girls and girly things and girlishness. This is going to be a huge, but welcome, change for the family. I'm very excited about having a little guy around - maybe with blond curly hair and my brown eyes?

So far, this pregnancy is going very well. I've been eating everything and had only very mild morning sickness. Maybe it's the difference between carrying boys and girls, but it's mostly healthy stuff I crave and I've developed almost an addiction to garlic. I will eat it raw. I smear it on toast. M had some stomach aches at first, because he'd gotten used to my not using it at all for the last 4 years and suddenly it's in everything but the oatmeal.

The due date is August 5, so another long hot pregnant summer to get through. But for now, we're enjoying the beautiful cool spring weather and getting outside all we can. Among the summer "indoor" projects that I've got planned is taking my blog entries from our stay in Kosovo last summer and printing them into some type of book or scrapbook or something. We've got tons of great picures to add, and I think it will be a great keepsake for our family.

D's fourth birthday is just around the corner too and it's amazing and wonderful to watch her change from a pre-schooler to a full-fledged "big girl." I love it.

Happy New Year!

I almost passed out when I realized it's been almost two months since my last post. I wish I had all kinds of good excuses involving exotic travel or top-secret missions, but really it just boils down to laziness, mixed with holiday-rushing-around-ness with a dash of kid-related craziness. It seems like every time that I did get around to writing I'd end up with D at one elbow and the dog at the other both of them staring at me like I never, ever spend any time with them at all. Well, maybe the dog has an excuse but certainly not the Kid.

Anyway. To summarize. Thanksgiving=Georgia with my sister-in-law's family. Christmas=North Carolina with my in-laws. New Year's=Us in a car returning from NC. Santa was great, D was a doll, we're back to school. The end.

NC was super, D & I had our first White Christmas, which just seemed so much more Christmas-y than the usual green Florida Christmas, where you're wearing shorts to Christmas breakfast and by the time the family gathers for dinner the a/c has kicked on. Something to be said for Jack Frost nipping at your nose after all.

Since we had snow, M was able to ski (no broken bones, whew!) and D went snow-tubing. Snow-tubing looks utterly dangerous, but really all that happens is your kid ends up soaking wet and frozen after a few hours of gliding down the slope. And this is just at the "bunny" slope for pre-schoolers or chicken-hearted older kids. She loved it though, as did Grandpa, who handled the push off duties, and M, who handled towing her back to the top of the slope at the end of each run. I was in charge of taking pictures, stamping my feet, and yelling "Put your hood up!" every 2 minutes. Despite my (groundless) fears of broken bones, both of them really enjoyed their winter adventures. One night at bedtime, D said to me "Mommy, am I a sespert?" Finally I puzzled out that she was saying "expert," as in expert tuber. She had overheard M's tales of going down the Black Diamond slope and my saying that was only for experts. Or the young. All my worrying for nothing though as everyone was just fine. I should remember that the next time I start to work myself up about things. Ooohhh...a resolution? Nah.

Anyway, yes I have missed writing here a lot and I'm glad my little blog hasn't disappeared into the ether. I promise I'll be back soon.

Organized

I finally overcame five years of procrastination and hung some pictures on the walls. As always with projects like that, you have a "why didn't we do this sooner" moment as you admire your handiwork. I can't even remember the reason we didn't when we first moved in, but I'm sure it had something to do with the fact that we never, ever imagined that we would be here this long. Now that they're up there, it's a sure-fire bet that M will get a job offer somewhere else and we'll have to move.

After some online research, I found a site that sells decorative iron work. I think some of the iron crosses would look super in the living room. I'm going to call today to find out where their stuff is made as I'd prefer to buy something made in the USA, not mass-produced elsewhere.

A busy week ahead... aside from our usual commitments, we're hosting D's playgroup this Friday which is doubling as a Bon Voyage party for our friends who are moving to D.C. Very sad. But we'll have a nice final playgroup with them. I'm going to get some t-shirts for the kids to decorate for each other and of course there'll be cake.

First Halloween

D was a Pumpkin Fairy for Halloween. We went to a Halloween party at a neighbor's, went trick-or-treating at 2 or 3 houses and then spent about an hour handing out candy, which I think was her favorite part of the night. She made sure EVERYONE went home with a package of candy corn. It was hilarious to hear her commenting on the other kids costumes - they'd say "oh what a cute little pumpkin" and she'd respond with "thanks, I like your [insert costume] too!" So grown up.

She got about 5 pieces of candy, which is perfect for a three-year-old. We have about a half-bucket leftover from trick-or-treating. I've scavenged all the Reese's cups out of it and the rest is just a giant orange bucket o' temptation. Lucky for me, basically all we have left are M&Ms and Snickers, and I'm not too fond of either of those except when I'm desperate for a chocolate fix.

Vegan conspiracy?

Mercury in our fish, mad cow and now bird flu in chickens. So what's a red-blooded carnivore like me supposed to eat? I suppose the people over at PETA are feeling pretty happy these days. I guess it's time to drag out my ancient Moosewood cookbook and try out some of their yummy veggie casseroles and soups. Actually though, I was a bit alarmed that bird flu was showing up in the Balkans, Croatia to be specific. Hygiene and food safety were HUGE issues when we were over there and I wouldn't be a bit surprised to see problems in Kosovo because of it. I'm glad M is not going back over after all.

In other news, I am so thankful that my family in Naples, FL was spared the worse of Hurricane Wilma. Actually Naples, which is mostly new construction, withstood the storm very well. I guess there is a lot of tree and foliage damage, but not to much structurally other than roofs, shingles and signs. Not at all like New Orleans, or even what Wilma did to Miami. My parents, sister and brother are all fine, and are waiting to get the utilities back on line. Actually my parents had phone service Monday night, which says a lot about Naples infrastructure, I think. My brother was hosting a Halloween party this weekend, which D, M and I were really looking forward to, but it's on hold until they know if they'll have electric and water (they have a well system).

In the meantime, here in St. Pete, we had some very blustery, rainy weather but the only catastrophic damage was to our Halloween decorations. You know that white cobwebby stuff you string up? Yeah, well, it's not made to withstand 40 mph wind gusts.

Have a spook-tacular Halloween! I'll post picture of D in her pumpkin costume next week!

Storm watch

Hello. I've dragged myself away from the Weather Channel's continuous coverage of Hurricane Wilma. I had to take a break. We have our evacuation plans. We've collected our important papers, precious mementos and of course, my iPod, and are ready to flee if need be. And this is all on the remote chance it heads toward the Bay area. Right now we're just on the fringes - close enough to need to prepare, far away enough to not take those preparations TOO seriously. For instance, my "supply" trip to Publix this morning. Sure I stocked up on more bottled water. But in trying to prepare, but not overprepare, I also found myself buying M&Ms, yogurt raisins, Tostitos, Stove Top stuffing, and Chocolate-flavored Silk. Mmmm. Random food items! There might be a meal in there, but basically, we'll be eating movie theatre snacks for a few days if we lose power.
At least they'll be easy to throw in the car in a hurry.

Probably the best comment I've heard so far on the hurricane was this morning at school drop-off. D was sitting with some of her little girlfriends and another little girl came running up saying, "Guys, guys...I have important and bad news! My daddy says this storm is going to hook a hard right and come right at us!" Immediately all the other little girls jumped in with their own commentary and opinions. It was so innocent and cute and grown up all at once.

Change in the air

I woke up - okay, I was woken up - at 7:00 and noticed the Change when I went into the kitchen to make the coffee. I quickly checked the thermostat, yep holding steady at 78 and the a/c wasn't even running. I opened the back door to cool(ish), dry air - Autumn has come to West Central Florida. Hurrah! While poor miserable Northerners get ready for months of cold and slush and thousand-dollar heating bills, Floridians are now looking forward to months of blue skies, low mosquito counts and beautiful weather. Beach weather! The temperature this morning was 76. A woman I used to work with had a theory that you knew it was going to be a good day if the first number of the temperature was the same - or lower - than the hour (e.g., 76 at 7 a.m. is good; 84 at 6:30 is bad.) Good day today!

The other big Change is my good friend Katy and her family are moving to Washington, D.C. She's the organizer for D's playgroup and her daughter and D have been playing together for over a year, which may not seem like a lot to you & I, but that's 1/3 of our kids lives! Anyway, when you've bonded over things like potty-training and pre-school, it's hard to say good-bye, but it's an exciting opportunity for their family, so we're happy for them too.

M was in D.C. this week as well, presenting on the Kosovo project. His presentation went very well and was well received. He came back energized and re-charged, just what he needs right now. I hope he starts seeing some more benefits from all the work he's put in this year.

But today we'll be enjoying the weather.

Adults only

This is our anniversary weekend - M & I have been married six wonderful years today. It is amazing to look back at all we've accomplished and done as a couple and a family; I couldn't have asked for more. It's amazing to see some of the things we discussed in our "five year plan" five years ago actually happening now. Equally as amazing is it has been 10 years almost to the day since I first met M and fell in love at first sight.

But the best part of this weekend is having some much needed time alone. D is spending the weekend with Aunt Debbie. It's been great - conversations go uninterrupted, we can watch whatever we want on TV (a Michael Douglas movie marathon) and walking the dogs takes an appropriate 10-15 minutes. I even slept in until 7 this morning. Last night we went to Bern's for dinner. Probably the most famous local restaurant/steakhouse in the area, we had a wonderful meal made even more wonderful by not having to rush back home to relieve a babysitter. This morning I'm suffering from still-full syndrome, I think my stomach is just getting around to processing dessert.

We pick D up at 4 this afternoon. So we have a whole day before we have to get back to being parents.

Night out

I am going out tonight! Alone! My sister Debbie is having a dinner & games girls-only night at her house, my other sister Bunky is driving up from Naples and M is watching D for the night, so I'm going out! I think this will be the first "fun" time I've had away from M & D since May, so I'm waaaaay overdue.

It comes at a great time too because it was sort of a rough week. M's been working "lawyers hours" - up at 5, home at 10. D's been waking up early too, and so we're all a bit sleep deprived. Not that it's an unfamiliar feeling. I think the last time I slept all the way through the night was in Budapest and before that.... maybe when M & I went to Aruba last year. D wakes up 2, maybe 3, times a night, either from bad dreams or she needs a drink of water or has to go potty or her sheets have gotten tangled. There's always some reason to yell for Mom & Dad. I imagine one day she'll be able to do all that stuff completely unassisted and then I'll feel sad because she's NOT waking me up every night, but then again, she'll probably be waking me up for different stuff. M tries to help but sometimes she just wants me. And I always feel really guilty for waking M up, after all he's the one that has to go to work, where if we're too tired we can just pod out at home all day. Not that the days are much fun when everyone is tired and cranky.

Truly, the biggest sufferer here is the ever-patient Fizzy, our dog (see picture). She must be wondering what in the world she did to be brought back here (hot, bugs, sketchy walks) from North Carolina (cool, no bugs, cats to play with, big deck overlooking mountain valley to play on, 4 walks/day). M's parents really took great care of her while we were away. She's not really ignored though - D's at the age where she just loves to "play" with the dog. Unfortunately this usually means running after or from her through the house. And since I have a rental car while my Murano is in the shop D and Fizzy have to sit next to each other in the back seat, which is always fun. The first time we all had to go somewhere I heard Fizzy shake and then D shout happily "OOOH, Fur!" Looked back to see a cloud of dog hair. They'll love me at the rental place.

I'm really looking forward to tonight.

Busytown

We had a pretty busy week. Besides the regular school and volunteer stuff, on Wednesday D and I also attended a cool program at Boyd Hill Nature Park, one of our favorite local parks. The program, called "Jungle Boogie," focuses on a different native animal every week and includes a story, short nature walk and a craft project. It's really neat.

On Thursday we had a bit of a car accident. I was driving down the street when one of my neighbors pulled out of the alley and ran right into the side of my car. It seemed like mostly cosmetic damage at the time, but it turns out my car wasn't drivable. Luckily my neighbor (who we're friends with) has great insurance and they had no problem getting me a rental car and taking care of towing my car to the body shop. They're supposed to have an estimate today of how long it will take to repair. I hope soon because the rental they gave me is a Pontiac Grand Prix, which is a perfectly fine car but just a wee bit flashy for me. I've never really felt that your car is a reflection of who you are, but I might change my mind if I have to drive around in a sports car for a few weeks.

So. On Friday, D suddenly spiked a fever so we spent the day resting and ended up doing the same on Saturday. M worked from home all day and I made homemade chicken noodle soup. It was my first try at homemade soup and frankly I don't think I'll ever eat canned again. It was delicious and had none of that funny, salty, tinny taste that even the best canned soups always have. M and I ate practically the whole pot on Saturday.

Inspired by my soup-er success, I went on to make homemade cinnamon rolls for breakfast Sunday and a broccoli salad for a party we went to Sunday night. So now I'm kind of cooked out. Luckily my sister Debbie has invited D & I for dinner tonight so I'll have a day off from the kitchen.

The big news this week is that we're getting TiVo installed tomorrow! I never thought I'd need something like this in my life, but I saw it in action a few weeks back and it made a convert out of me. Plus M won't have to rush home from work on Wednesdays to watch "Lost." After this my last big technical challenge is converting everything to wireless, and if you think it takes a long time to roll this kind of stuff out at work, try doing it with a three-year-old interrupting you every 20 seconds.

In the midnight hour

M comes home from Kosovo today. His part of the project has wrapped up although it looks like it will be another year before the UN pulls out. Maybe they can use that time to pin down exactly how the Kosovars expect to support themselves once they are independent.

I've not been sleeping well, staying up far too late. In part because I can't calm my brain down enough to get a good night's sleep and in part because the cable channels have been showing Titanic a couple times a week and really, I just can't get enough of that movie. I have no idea why I haven't bought the DVD yet, but if it's on TV I can't resist watching and hoping - again and again - that Jack makes it out alive and he and Rose live happily ever after. (For the two or three people out there who haven't seen it AND coincidentally stumble on this blog: sorry for giving away the ending.) Anyhoo, the movie clocks in at three hours and change and tends to start around 11:00 pm so, you do the math, but generally it means I'm up until 2:00 watching the ship go down. Even after seeing it dozens of times, I still cry a bit during the "Jack! I'm flying!" part and when Rose can't wake Jack up at the end and when Celine starts singing at the credits. But at least I'm not thinking about my own misery during all this so for me the movie has fulfilled it's promise of Escapist Entertainment. But now that M's home I may have to switch to something a wee more highbrow, or at the very least something we haven't seen before.

For me, working through the grief and loss of the baby has resulted in my trying to stay very busy, which it turns out isn't that hard to do with a three-year-old in the house, especially since her school requires volunteer hours. I've signed up for a couple classroom projects and I'm in charge of their Valentine's Day party (OK, that's February but I'm thinking about it now!). Also I'm working on Teacher Appreciation Week, there's the school Silent Auction in October, field trips, etc. Then we've got our neighborhood playgroup, which has been so supportive of our family during all this. Plus I'm still in the Junior League and between committees and monthly meetings (which start again this month), it's that time of the year where I start wondering if I should buy a PDA and get myself organized instead of wandering around town with random dates and times scribbled on the backs of whatever loose paper I find in my purse.

Life does go on, whether you like it or not.

Loss

(Warning: Graphic details ahead!)

Has it really been two weeks since my last post? Seems like two days with everything that has been going on. Our week in North Carolina turned into an exercise in grief and loss. First D and I had to cut short our visit in Atlanta to stay ahead of any hurricane Katrina-related storms. Then Tuesday we weathered through a day with no power, no water at my in-laws house as the remnants of Katrina blew through. When the power did come back on, it was almost as if we were glued to the TV unable to turn away from the horrible devastation on the Gulf Coast. One day with no power, no water a small penance for what was happening there.

The loss got personal on Wednesday however. Mid-morning I started bleeding a little bit and when it didn't stop even after I lay down for awhile, I called my OB in St. Pete and he said I needed to go to the ER. Where, to my horror and disbelief, I found out that I was miscarrying our precious baby. Loss and grief don't even begin to describe what I felt and am still feeling. I called M who made arrangements to fly up a day early on Thursday to be with us. The ER doctor at Haywood Regional Medical Center was very compassionate and wisely made arrangements for me to see a local OB in the morning just to confirm what was happening. Unfortunately, the next morning (Thursday) I woke up feeling like I was in labor. The cramping/contractions were so severe I couldn't stand up. By the time my MIL got me to the OB I was bleeding heavily and couldn't really walk. So I ended up having emergency surgery - a D&C - under general anesthesia. With M not there. With D in the waiting room with my MIL. With me crushed under a black hole of loss and sadness.

Even after seeing my own OB back here in town and being reassured that it was just "one of those things" and we could try again as soon as we wanted to and yes, my age (almost 39) is a risk factor, but only in the 20-30% range since I already have a healthy baby, I wake up every morning not really comprehending that I'm NOT pregnant, that it really did happen. And have to cope with the fear that it could happen again. The one beautiful thing is D, who I am so grateful for. I can't imagine what it would be like not to have a child to hold during all of this and my heart breaks for women who miscarry on their first pregnancies, or who may have miscarried several times, or who may be waking up every morning wondering if they'll ever be able to carry a baby of their own.

I am fortunate to have two close friends who have been through miscarriages who understand how it feels and the emptiness you feel. They reassure me that it's OK, really, to feel like you're not over it yet. I wake up in the morning thinking, it's been two weeks (exactly two weeks today) and I'm still sad and depressed. I'm not over it. Is that OK? Shouldn't I have snapped out of it by now? No, I guess not. I am surprised at how many other women that I know have said that they also had one (and in a lot of cases, gone on to have more children!). It really is just something that we (as women) don't talk about. I don't like talking about it because the grief and fear is so personal and overwhelming that I ache and could just cry and cry all day thinking about it.

So, we are trying to resume our normally scheduled programming of preschool and playdates and parties and grocery shopping. We eat our meals, although sometimes a bit later than usual, and we walk the dog and I email my friends. I think it's called getting back to normal.

Recent developments

I can't believe it's been over a week since I last posted. When we were abroad I was obsessed with writing something every day. Then again, I didn't have much else to do.

Hectic times here lately! M is trying to figure out a way to go back to Kosovo and work with all the various organizations through the transition period this fall. It's hard to believe that Kosovo thinks it's ready for independence, but I guess that's why everyone is working so hard. IMHO it would be a bit like sending your 8th grader to college just because he bought college-level textbooks. What do I know! Anyway, the debate here is whether D and I would return with him, complicated by the fact that we recently discovered that I'm a bit over two months pregnant! Very exciting and we've been talking about expanding our family for a while now, but I never thought it would happen while we were in Kosovo. Anyway, I'm not sure I'm ready to brave Pristina while I'm in the throes of morning/noon/night sickness. It's hard enough to keep down foods that I like, let alone think about the stuff that we ate over there. The water situation is also a concern. But I totally support M going back and finishing what he started. It would be lonely, but it would just be for a few months (or so they say).

Other than that, we're firmly in the pre-school routine and D is really enjoying it. It gives me a few hours of rest time a week, which I really look forward to.

Next weekend D & I are driving to Atlanta to visit my b.f. Lisa and her family. Then off to North Carolina for a week at my in-law's house in the mountains and to pick up our dog Fizzy, who's been boarding with them since May. Ought to be lovely and I hope the blueberries are still in season!

First Day of School

Today was D's first day of school. In preparation, we've been practicing a "School Day" routine for about a week and it's a good thing that we didn't try to wing it because it turns out D needs a considerable amount of time to wake up in the morning (takes after her father that way). But by this morning, we were all ready to get up and at 'em at 6:15 in the morning. I let her have five minutes to get the sleep out then time to wash up, dress and go through the agony of what to do with her curly, un-ruly hair. Ponytail, of course. All in all it went very smoothly and she looked adorable with her backpack.

We got to the school in a torrential downpour, so instead of dropping off in the car line I had to carry her in under the umbrella. I helped her get her things stashed away, then Ms. Donna asked all the kids to come sit on the carpet at the front of the room. We had a touch-and-go moment because D wanted to sit in "her" chair with her name tag on it, but I reminded her that she was there to learn and listen to Ms. Donna. She seemed OK with that and then I got out of there as quick as I could.

It was weird when I went back to pick her up. She seemed...older. Talking about kids I didn't know, singing songs I didn't know. Now I know how parents end up out of touch with their kids.

She's only going Tuesday and Thursday mornings, so I'm making a special effort to enjoy the time we will get to spend together.

High hopes

Ah, the weekend. Well, for D & I anyway. M is working really long hours just now. I don't think he's been home before 9 one night this week and he had to work last Saturday and this Saturday as well.

My parents are coming up to visit us tomorrow and then D & I will be down in sunny Naples all next week. My sister, Bunky, is taking three days off to hang out with us. I can't wait to see everyone. I'd also like to catch up on some movies, like Madagascar, and get a pedicure and maybe leave D with mom & dad for a few hours and just relax somewhere. Except for one 20 minute break in Macedonia I haven't had any time to myself for months.

In other developments, there is a new Chinese restaurant, Great Wall 2, on Fourth Street and rumor has it the food is very good. I've gotten my hopes up before only to be disappointed, but I'm willing to give them a try. Saint Petersburg really needs a good Chinese take-out place. Maybe this is it.

I finished the new Harry Potter last night and I'm more a fan than ever. Such great story-telling! So many loose ends! Can I pre-order Number Seven now?! As much as I (and probably a million other readers) don't want to see the end of the series, i can imagine how hard it must be on J.K. Rowling to let it go. In the meantime, I'll move on to some of the other (i.e. adult) books that I've been wanting to read or that have been recommended to me: The Kite Runner, Family Matters (by Rohinton Mistry who wrote A Fine Balance, which was excellent!) and The Historian - a new book that has something to do with vampires and history and, well, I can't remember any more right now but it sounded interesting at the time and I put it on my must-read list.

Another boiling hot day here. I'm happy to stay inside where it's nice and cool. D told me today at the supermarket that she likes hot weather cause it makes everything "so warm and cozy." She may be more of an optimist than I am.

Little big girl

Our little big girl is growing up. D is officially potty training. I wish I could say trained, but I'm still putting her in pull-ups at night, when we go out or on long car rides. She did it "all by herself" in just two days! Kind of gives credence to the theory that you just need to educate, introduce and then let the kid take it from there. I am very proud of her and look forward to crossing diapers off my grocery list. I'll keep wipes on there though. Lots of uses for them.

D's doing really well. You'd never know we only got back a week ago. The biggest holdover from our time in Kosovo is that we're no longer dependent on TV. We're down to barely an hour a day - she gets 30 minutes in the morning while I take my shower and 30 in the evening (if we've had a good day). Even I no longer look to it as a "babysitter." She seems so much older - happy to play with her Care Bears or Calico Corner animals. She'll stage massive tea parties for all her stuffed animal friends. Or look at her books. Or she'll sit on the couch with this great, wrinkled-brow, concentrating look and when I ask her what she's thinking about she'll say "What's the name of that song, the one about the mountains?" And I'll have to wrack my brain and try to sing or hum all the songs she may have heard about mountains. It's like playing Cranium, all day long.

Back to normal

We've been home almost a whole week now. Time just flies when you're having fun...or unpacking, organizing, doing mountains of laundry, sorting mail.

Our homecoming was pretty smooth, even though only 1 out of our 4 big suitcases made it to Tampa. We also had an hour wait in customs because a thunderstorm prevented them from unloading the plance. When we finally cleared customs and got to the terminal, I spotted my sister and pointed her out to D, who popped out of her stroller and sprinted across the terminal screaming "Aunt Debbbbieeeeeeee" and wrapped herself around her. It was so touching, it makes me tear up even now. I'm so glad that they have such a strong relationship.

The first few days back were a bit tumultuous. M was down with a ferocious case of jet-lagged induced traveler's tummy. He ended up being up all night Tuesday throwing up and then slept all day Wednesday. Our bags made it home on Thursday night. We got a call at about 1 in the morning from a nice man informing us that they were on the way. I informed him he could leave them on the doorstep for us. They were too heavy for anyone to steal anyway.

We had a few mornings of waking up at 4:00 or so, but now we're all sleeping until our regular times and D is back on schedule - HURRAY! In bed by 7:45, sleeping until 7:30. As my good friend Lisa once told me (speaking from her experience with two active boys): "sleep begets sleep." Something I take to heart.